The Almost After and So Much More

So to answer my mother’s question, no, I have not “given up” on my blog.  The last few months have been, as most of you know, interesting.  And I chose that word carefully.  There have been ups and downs.  Hills, valleys, sunshine, rain, the gamut.  What I’m left knowing is that everything is going to be ok.  One way or another.

And at this point you’re probably all thinking, spare us the melodrama Anna, show us the pictures of your apartment.  I am at your service.  We’ll start upstairs this time because the least has changed there.  What was once a guest bedroom is, for now, an arts and crafts room:

Boring, I know.  Bring on the scrapbooking jokes.  I plan on getting a new bed pretty soon and when that happens, my old bed will go in here for visitors.  Though I feel it must be said, I have been very lucky to have as many visitors as I have so far.  Elizabeth drove all the way up from Des Moines alone and my parents have been up, my mom doing the trip twice.  Not to out-do Elizabeth but she drove the whole way from the Quadcities alone…that’s slightly longer.  The reason my mom came up the second time was to pin me on as a captain.  Yes, after continuing to draw breath for 6 months I got the obligitory JAG promotion to captain.  It’s great because we get paid more, we get salutes from a handful more people, etc.  It’s terrifying because now people expect us to know what we’re doing which I can safely say, 75% of the time I’m still only making a somewhat educated guess.  So here’s a picture of Lt Col Harding and my mom pinning on the captain’s bars.  Please don’t ask why I’m making that face, if I knew I would have avoided making it.

So back to the apartment.  The only other new thing upstairs is the curtains in the study which honestly, is so not worth a picture.  So let’s move downstairs.  First, try not to fall over the cats.

Quick question, is the look on Jonesie’s face a little too similar to the look on my face during the promotion ceremony?  No?  Good answer.

The living room has probably seen the most dramatic change.  For one, there’s furniture.  And lamps.  And art. 

And from there, into the dining room:

On to the kitchen:

A lot of changes in all of those three rooms so I’ll just give you a minute to flip back and forth between the before pictures in the old post and these.  Awed?  Good, then the basement is going to blow you away:

Don’t worry, although you can’t see all of the 4th Ave. Drinking Team label anymore, everytime I walk down into that basement, I’m remind of my roots.  Once you move in, being a part of that team is in your soul.  A few bins of holiday decorations covering the lower portion won’t change that.  Nothing can change that.

Moving on something closely related to being on a drinking team, it’s the basement bathroom.  Still mostly gross but usable on very limited emergency type occasions:

And now back upstairs.  On the way up, make sure to take note of the cats’ new water and food dishes.  They’re extatic.

All that remains is the great outdoors.  In the next couple months I’ll post anew with the changing weather but today was absolutely perfect and if you don’t mind, please just think of Grand Forks as such.  Somehow, pretending winter won’t ever come makes each day a little better.

Front:

Back:

To the left you can see the air conditioning unit that I have not yet had to turn on.  Yes, that is a hint of pride you detect.

Alright, so that’s it.  Those are the digs currently.  What else has been going on with me?  So sweet of you to ask.  Well, tomorrow at 8am I’ll hop a plane out of Grand Forks and head down to Scott AFB, which is in southern Illinois down by St. Louis.  Hopefully while there I will learn a great deal about 18th AF’s philosophies on military justice and more importantly, see some of my family.  It’s sad when I’m close because I’m only 6 hours away.  So I’ll be at Scott all week and then after a quick jaunt to Maxwell AFB in Alabama, I’ll be back home in Grand Forks.  That’s right folks, Grand Forks is my home.  I haven’t been there much this last month which the cats have been more than a little irritated with me about.  And unfortunately September isn’t looking that much better between recruiting in the Twin Cities, a wedding in St. Paul, and my 5 year college reunion in Northfield, MN, my weekends are pretty full.  But at least they’re full with things I’m going to really enjoy and heck, maybe even see some of you! 

And as my parting gift to every last one of you, I give you the Peddle Pub:

It’s exactly as it sounds.

The In-between…

So my apartment is long from finished, I’m quite sure it never will be, but it’s much more livable than it was in “The Before…”  So I decided to do a in-between post so everyone could see the evolution.  This Friday my parents come in their new RV bringing with them Tom and everything he owns.  So a week from now, if all goes according to a well thought out plan, the apartment should be looking infinitely better with the addition of some more furniture, electronics and whatever else it is exactly that Tom brings to the table:)  So without further ado, here’s what my living room looks like now:

Does it look much different then before?  No.  Is there any rhyme or reason to it? No.  But it has some place to sit.  It might be a slightly odd place to sit.  It might lack color, art, or design but give me time…

Next is the dining room.  We have some improvement here but we’re still struggling:

The boxes along the wall are not a decorative piece and the winerack will probably need to find a new home but hey, at least there is somewhere to sit and eat now.  Of course the most intricate thing I’ve cooked so far is fruit salad and I’m not even sure if that counts as cooking but were I to cook, this is where I would sit and eat it.  Imagine it.  Just imagine it.

Speaking of cooking, let’s take a look at the kitchen:

Again, still empty despite the wonderful microwave my sponsor picked up for me on the side of the road.  And not only empty, a little slanty too.  My pub table and refrigerator list dangerously toward the door but that’ll work itself out…hopefully without an extremely heavy appliance falling on someone.

OK, now for the upstairs.  At the top of the stairs, the bathroom:

That was boring.  How about my closet:

Alright, that’s pretty boring too.  Well, maybe except for the fact that for someone who wears a uniform everyday to work, I own entirely too many clothes.  And don’t even think that this is all there is…

So, maybe the guest bedroom will be more interesting:

Wow, I apologize.  That was really lame.  Uh, go Cubs?

How about the master bedroom.  I use the term master loosely.

That’s a little better.  The bedroom is probably the room that I’ve been brave enough to hang things and decorate things in the most.  It still has pictures leaning against the wall and bare spots waiting for furniture, but again, stay tuned. 

Here we have the office which is where this brilliant blog is being written.  Try not to be too awestruck.  It’s only a room.

Here again we have a room lacking some charm, some character but at least it has a clock…

And finally, here’s my porch:

It needs furniture and I made the unfortunate discovery that the porch light doesn’t work (despite the switch, fixture, and new bulb) but there is some color now and if you look very closely between the rails of the porch you can see some of the grass I planted coming up.  Here’s what I don’t recommend though, planting grass seed and only having a watering can to water it with when it requires at least 8 full cans to properly water.  Your neighbors will think you’re weird.  Though on the topic of neighbors, one of mine did tell me she likes to watch me garden.  So Mom, no worries about me living alone and no one keeping an eye on me.  The lovely old woman two doors down watches me while she smokes.  She’s going to give me emphazema but she might just notice if I disappear. 

Well, on that creepy note, I’ll sign off.  Work is still good.  We have some courts coming up later this summer and I should get to be co-trial counsel (for those not versed on military law, that means prosecutor) on a couple.   I write a couple legal reviews a day to keep my mind nimble and I spend the rest of my time trying to fix things that aren’t really that broken.  Oh, and from time to time I see a legal assistance client I can actually help.  Most just leave now knowing they need to hire an attorney…a real one.  So that’s it for now.  I hope everyone is doing well at their respective bases/schools/jobs/lives.  For you military types, I’m posting my DSN so in case FLITE has elluded you (I’m not teasing, it slips away from me frequently) you can give me a shout.  Everyone else, you know how to reach me.  I miss you all everyday.

The Before…

I know you’ve all been waiting with bated breath to see pictures of my new place, so here they are.  And yes, your eyes are not deceiving you, it looks like total crap.  It’s got drywall dust all over and it’s missing many lighting fixtures.  It’s a work in progress.  I think once I get it cleaned and decorated it will be all that much more satisfying to put up pictures of how sweet it looks…here’s hoping.  Oh, also, I found out my stuff that’s been in storage won’t be arriving till the 27th…arg, what’s a girl to do with no furniture?

Here’s the front:

And the entry way:

That’s looking into the living room.  It needs to be painted and that white stuff is drywall dust.  I’m operating under the assumption that it will look better not covered in a fine white mist.  Now here are the living room and then dining room:

So this is one of my favorite things so I had to show this.  This is the built in cabinets in the dining room…cute right?

Here’s the kitchen:

Here’s the scary stairs down to the basement and the lovely graffiti left by previous tenants.  By living there am I automatically a memberof this team? 

Now moving upstairs…

This is the upstairs hall and bathroom:

And the bedrooms, there are 4, all pretty much look like this.  Some have more windows and are bigger or smaller but this gives you a good idea.

So that’s it.  Home sweet home.  Right now it looks like a lot of dust and work but hopefully in the near future I’ll be putting up some after pictures that are a little nicer.  Also, as a side note, work is great.  Super busy but learning millions of things every day.  Miss you all!

I Will Not be Homeless!

Just a quick update.  I found a place to live!  Yay:)  It’s a pretty cool old brownstone right off of downtown.  I’ll post pictures soon.  Just wanted everyone to know that Jack, Jonesie, and me will not be living on the street.  Might not seem like a huge accomplishment but Grand Forks turned out to not be very pet friendly so it actually is.  I’ll keep you all updated!

Back in the Windy City and then on to the Snowy City

Before I get into my new exploits in North Dakota, I wanted to fullfill a promise.  I told my friends in Chicago that since I spent a week with them that I would blog it so all my Air Force friends could read about them.  Kind of the reverse of what we’ve had so far.  So here goes.  I spent 5 nights in Chicago and somehow managed to wrangle up enough people to go to Cubs games 2 of those nights.  Actually, my awesome friends worked out all the details so all I had to do was sit back and enjoy the games.  The first night we did so from a rooftop.

The down side of the rooftop is that it was a little chilly and windy but we struggled through…because there was an inside section with a buffet.  But just to prove that we did go outside at least once:

Did I mention it was windy?  Also, quick shout out to Christine (pictured above with wind tussled locks) who just got engaged earlier this week.  Congrats guys!

The next night we actually headed into the park to watch the game.  Unfortunately, unlike the first night, the Cubs were not able to pull out a victory.  We still had fun though.

Besides a quick trip to John Marshall and a few dinners with friends, the last thing on the Chicago agenda was a Costco sponsored party for Tom and me.  Per usual at 4022 N. Sheridan, there was tons of food (stellar beans as always, Liz, cheesey potatoes to die for, Elizabeth, and enormous quantities of meat courtesy of the newly engaged)  Unfortunately I took no reasonable pictures that night so your imaginations will have to paint the picture of the last night I sat, wind swept and merry, on the balcony of 4022.  A picture is not necessary to cause one solitary tear to role down my cheek.  Too dramatic?

The next morning Tom and I packed the car, the poor little red Kia that has seen so much, to its fullest.  Despite my desperate pleas to save my dying plants from their brown thumbed captors, Tom would not let me pack them all.  Only one plant made it to North  Dakota…only time will tell the fate of the rest.  So with only one plant in tow, we headed to Minneapolis were we spent one night.  One great evening catching up with friends and a 7 mile (nice and easy) run with Tom’s sisters later, I was on my way to North Dakota alone.  Well, not fully alone.  Jack and Jonesie (for those of you just tuning in, these are my cats) were nestled safely in their carrier somewhere in my car admist suitcases, dufflebags, boxes, and one plant (can you tell I’m upset about the plants?). 

We made it to North Dakota.  Although it rained as I drove through Fargo (yes, it’s still mostly under water), the skies cleared and the rain stopped by the time I got to Grand Forks.  The base is about 15 miles outside of the actual town.  At the gate you are greated with the large painted words, “Warriors of the North.”  I checked in, got the cats settled in and then met my sponsor.  For those of you new to all this (as am I), a sponsor is someone assigned to you prior to your arrival at any new base who is responsible for getting you settled in and acclimated.  So I met my sponsor and he took me to dinner at his neighbor’s house in the on-base housing.  Not only did I get a home cooked meal out of the deal, I also got a plate to take home which lasted for 2 more meals.  As we were eating, something strange started to happen…by the time I returned to billeting that night, this is what I found:

That’s right.  This was my welcome to Grand Forks AFB.  The cats were confused.  I dropped my phone in the snow.  I think I saw a squirrel run backwards up a tree.  Just one short week ago I was safely in the warmth of the Bible Belt, and now look at me.  But on the upside, my room at billeting is huge. 

So now I’m here.  I’m looking for a place to live (which is actually proving to be pretty difficult – Grand Forks does not equal pet friendly), getting in-processed on base (only 4 shots so far…), and starting to figure out what kind of job I’m actually going to be doing (apparently something legal).  Everyone here is great (so far so good anyway) and I have my own office with chairs and everything!  Once I get it spruced up a bit I’ll throw a picture up here.  I know how you all love pictures of really mundane things. 

I think that’s all I have for now from Grand Forks.  I miss everyone but don’t worry, I’m doing fine up here in the north country.  Though my o’s seem to be getting a little longer…

North Dakota: Legendary

As I am sure you can tell by this poorly written post, this is not Anna. She did however send me the picture below. She asked me to post it for her because she has not figured out how to connect to the internet yet and she wanted you guys to all be jealous of her new view. Hopefully she will get all the technological kinks worked out this week and can let you know in her own words how awesome North Dakota is.

Graduation and then Good-Bye…for now

I had an interesting conversation with a friend the other day because she mentioned that it seems like I had gotten myself into a line of work where I would be saying a lot of good-byes.  Good-byes to family and friends in Chicago because since there are no AF bases there, as long as I’m in the AF, I’ll never live there.  Good-byes to the friends I went through a debatably rough 5 weeks within COT.  Good-byes to my fellow green JAGS as we all graduate from JASOC and move on to our new bases.  And in 2 years (or so) I’ll be saying good-bye to all those I meet at Grand Forks.  At this point the pattern is obvious.  A life in the military means a constant stream of new friends, co-workers, acquaintances, and mentors coming in and out of your life.  So why on earth would a person put themselves through that?  Well, after much thought, I guess my answer is that if the price of having these people in my life is that I have to say good-bye to them from time to time, that’s a price I’m willing to pay.  There’s a chance I may never see some of the friends I made in JASOC again.  There’s also a good chance their our paths will cross again.  As we’re often told, it’s a small Air Force.  But either way, I feel lucky to have had them as a part of my life for even the limited time that I did. 

So with that mushy stuff out of the way, let me get down to the nuts and bolts of graduation.  On Thursday night we had our JASOC dining out.  Now I’ve put lots of pictures up about dining outs and I think I’ve done a good job of explaining what they are like.  But something I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned (TJAG can attest to my inability to accurately remember what I’ve said on this blog) is that every dining out has a Madam and Mr. Vice who act as part entertainment, part officiants of the mess (another name for the dining out).  Think award show host.  I was asked to be Madam Vice for our dining out and I reluctantly (and I really mean that, I did not see this being a good idea) agreed.  Mr. Vice was Michael O’Brien who has made appearances in previous posts and who is a fellow JMLS alumn.  We stumbled our way through the evening with arguably witty banter and some skipped or premature lines.  But we were far from the highlight of the dining out.  The spotlight definitely belonged to the real enterntainment – the skit and the Thunder JAGs.  Now it’s impossible to describe either of these phenomenon so I won’t even try.  But here’s a picture of the Thunder JAGs just to give you idea.  This if from the D.C. Dining Out.

Now it might not look like much from this picture but trust me, plastic briefcases and some fancy marching make an awe inspiring sight. 

The next bit of entertainment was the skit which made me almost pee my pants infront of a crowd of about 200.  The skit ended with a song written and sung by my very musically gifted classmates.  Now this I don’t even have to try to explain because luckily it was recorded and can forever be relived simply by visiting youtube. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SldwW35ZBX4 

Some of it might not be easy understand because of the sound or because they’re inside jokes but again you’ll have to trust me when I say it was very clever.

Dining out was followed by the obligatory game of crud.  My parents were lucky enough to see me in action for the first time.  It probably scarred them.  For good crud playing pictures, check out Johnny Utah’s blog. 

Some how we managed to get home at a reasonable hour and drag ourselves to our pre-graduation breakfast the next morning.  Shortly thereafter we graduated.  A simple shake, take, and salute and it was over.  Here I go…

Phew, I didn’t mess it up.  Then it was time for some final pictures in the courtroom at the JAG School:

And then it became time to say good-bye.  This pictures says it all:

Well, I’m not actually positive what this picture says.  I see some confusion from Amber and Joni and I look sad but in a creepy way.  But we were sad but as I said before, it’s ok because this is not good-bye for good.  This is good-bye until we next call to get help with something we’re working on (Amber and I already had that conversation today) or good-bye until our paths cross again and we can sit down for a beer and catch up (Joni and I will be doing that tonight) or even good-bye until I have something silly I need to text to you (Kurt gets more than his share of those).  So it’s not good-bye for good.  Far from it.

Graduation Time

Before you all fly into a rage at me, I would like to take this opportunity to apologize for my delinquency in updating my blog.  Florida seems like eons ago and there’s no good excuse for not being a more timely blogger.  So what’s happened over the last few (yeah, I’m a liar, I know it’s been way more than that) weeks? 

Well, a lot has happened.  We’ve done two moot courts and taken another test.  I passed the test and I’m pretty sure the moot courts.  Nothing wildly exciting happened…no Perry Mason (or as I prefer, Matlock) moments.  Everyone passed the final test in my class which means that on Friday we’ll all graduate.  We all also passed the military justice portions of the course so that we will also be certified in military justice.  We have also taken two PT tests.  Today was the second and final one.  Now since arriving in Alabama I have now taken the PT test a total of 5 times.  Your run of the mill member of the Air Force takes it once a year.  So I guess at this point it shouldn’t be such a big deal for me to take it…again and again.  But here’s the thing, I consider myself a somewhat athletic person (meaning I don’t hurt myself every time I undertake an athletic endeavor) and therefore I felt it necessary to set a high goal for myself on this test I would have multiple opportunities to take.  I didn’t see any reason why I shouldn’t be getting a perfect score (100 – we like to keep things simple in the AF).  In my previous 4 test I have fallen into the 95 to 98.75 range.  Today, and I know you’re all waiting with bated breath at this point, I managed a perfect score!  Now some of my more athletically gifted friends may find this only mildly impressive but that’s not really the point.  Impressing the lot of you is on my to-do list but not right at the top.  Mostly I was just happy that today, for whatever reason, for the first time I was able to do 45 push ups in a minute.  Again, no mind blowing feat but it’s a goal attained and no matter how low the bar, I know you all will be proud of me for that.

OK, on to more interesting things I’ve done over the last month or so.  The highlight was probably our week long trip to Washington, D.C.  I’ve been to D.C. before but not since I was young and I have very little memory of it.  I learned a lot of things in D.C.  I learned that the cherry blossoms generally peak sometime in late March or early April (they peaked while we were there…very nice).  I learned what the inside of the Pentagon and the U.S. Supreme Court looks like.  I learned that Georgetown is probably one of the most beautiful campuses ever.  And finally, I learned that my boss (and I mean my ultimate, 3 star general, big boss – not the president, don’t get carried away), reads my blog.  Now I won’t go into detail about how I found this out or what the repercussions were (they only involved me having to drink orange chunky liquid in front of a large group of high ranking JAGs) but I will say that TJAG (“The JAG” – I’m not kidding) has a sense of humor.  Anyway, D.C. was a very informative and at the same time terrifying trip that I will never forget.  Here are some pictures since what would a blog post be without them.

Amber, Joni, and I in front of the Air Force Memorial:

A bunch of us at the dining out…this is after pouring orange lumpy stuff on myself.  I still look pretty happy:

And a quick shot in the Mall and no, Amber, there is no Old Navy at this mall…

Hopefully by updating I’ve redeemed myself a little.  I will be back in Chicago on Tuesday and then it’s on to Grand Forks for me to start being a real lawyer for the first time.  I only graduated a year ago so that’s normal…right?  I can’t wait to see everyone in the QCA, Chicago, and/or Twin Cities.  I will try to quickly post something/anything about graduation.  I’m sure there will be lots of pictures but hopefully not more embarrassing trips to the grog…also another explanation for another time.

Utlimate Disappointment

So good news, Delta Flight won our first ultimate frisbee game in an amazing come-from-behind, overtime effort.  This picture was taken after we won that game…

Then we proceeded to lose the next 2 games.  Bummer.  Here’s a picture after that game.

Other than losing frisbee, not much has happened.  I passed the first test which was difficult.  I really did believe for a while that I hadn’t passed but within a few hours of taking the test they told us our entire class had passed.  Apparently this hasn’t happen for the last few JASOC classes so they were very happy with us.  Starting Monday we have our first moot court.  I go Monday afternoon and feel, at this point, that I have no idea what’s going on.  So that’s a good feeling.  But, per usual, I will keep you all updated on how that goes.  I have to go work on my sentencing argument now…here’s the gist, LSD use is bad and you will be kicked out of the Air Force for doing it.  And just for those of you out there wondering, the same is true for most hallucinogenic drugs.   

Florida

This is going to be brief because I should definitely be studying instead of doing this but since I haven’t been productive all day, I figure, why not keep the streak alive?

So this week we spent two nights in Florida on Eglin AFB.  The basic gist of the trip was get some exposure to parts of the Air Force we won’t get to see on a regular basis or maybe ever.  So the first thing we did was get to play around in an F-15.  Of course they only let us play in ones that are no longer used (A Model) because as we would spend the rest of our time in Florida proving, JAGs cannot be trusted with any kind of weapon.  So the plane I’m sitting in can’t even taxi around anymore but if you squint you can pretend I’m actually flying it. 

Also, all you Top Gun fans out there, I learned something very interesting.  As it turns out there is no way what happened to Goose could actually happen in one of these planes.  If you want me to explain why, I’d be happy to though I won’t do so now because there are just too many people I could bore with those details. 

After fake flying an F-15, we moved on to playing with the AF’s MWDs (military working dogs).  I know it sounds like they pull carts but they’re actually the bomb and drug sniffing dogs.  A few of my colleagues got to put on the padded suits and get tackled and bitten by the dogs.  It was pretty cool…for us to watch.  Here’s a pic of my fellow JMLS grad Michael O’Brien getting mauled by probably the meanest dog I’ve ever seen in my life.

I realize it doesn’t look that bad but trust me it was.  He was tossed into the fence before he got drug to where he is in this picture.  This is them trying to get the dog off of him.  This particular dog, one of the times he was attacking he got so excited he passed out cold.  His adrenaline was pumping so hard (aka he was so freaking excited to bite someone) he knocked himself out.  Just goes to show once again that in the AF, we don’t do anything half assed.

OK, speaking of the AF being awesome, the next thing we did was take a tour of the largest climatology lab in the world.  It’s on Eglin AFB and can accommodate the AF’s largest plane, the C-5, with 5 feet of clearance.  When we were there it was negative 25 degrees.  They gave us parkas and let us go into the lab.  I suppose this is exactly the type of weather I should be getting used to since North Dakota will be my home come next winter.  This lab can also create sand storms, blizzards, rain, wind, and about any type of weather you can imagine.  They use it to test planes and pretty much everything else the AF uses in all sorts of different climates.  They also rent it out to commercial companies to use to test their products.  However, if anyone is thinking this might be a good place for a foam party, a. you’re right but b. it’s booked for the next 4 years.

 Then we went to beach to eat our box lunches.  Here, this group of airmen asks, “What is this and how do we fly planes on it?”

After the beach, we spent some quality time with Security Forces (AF cops).  These are the guys who do everything from watching the gates at AFBs to guarding caravans in Iraq (very dangerous).  They’re also the ones who arrest the people we prosecute as JAGs.  So we got some training on their Use of Force guidelines (when to shoot someone) and toured a bunch of their facilities.  This is one of the times we showed we should never be given guns.  We did some simulations where we had to choose when to shoot and when not to…we tended to favor the prior.  We also learned that when you do decide to fire, shooting the person 20 times may be considered excessive force.  At this point I do need to clarify that I never shot anyone…probably only because we ran out of time before my turn.  In any event I probably would have shot off my own foot before shooting a civilian.

That night we went out it Destin.  There we found a bar made of money that served something called an Irish Wake…well, it was green and had alcohol in it.  That’s all you need to know.

Oh, and also, if you have enough of them you will feel sorry for a stuffed bear and be willing to kiss a moose.

The next morning we started by meeting the SJA (Staff Judge Advocate) of the Air Force Special Operations Command at Hulburt Field (another AFB right next to Eglin).  Then we went out to see the Combat Controller training facility.  Combat Control in the Af is like the Army Rangers or Navy Seals.  They’re special ops for the AF which basically means they do the most top secret, dangerous stuff.  I learned that it’s congressionally mandated that women can’t be a part of the Combat Control.  Bummer, I was thinking of ditching this lawyer gig to learn how to hold my breath underwater for 2 hours and jump out of a plane with no parachute (I may be exaggerating but I’m pretty sure they do stuff kinda like that). 

Next we went to the Air Park at Hurlburt Field which is basically a parking lot for a bunch of cool planes.  A historian walked us through and told us what the planes where and what they had been used for.  It was all very interesting though I have to admit, I have no retention for that type of information.  I am proud to admit I can tell the difference between a helicopter and an airplane though.  See, helicopter:

Airplane:

Seriously, though, I am slowly learning the different planes.  This one above here is actually an AC-130 and it’s huge.  I’ve also learned that the AF doesn’t really do helicopters.  That’s more of an army thing.  I’m not kidding.  We admit it.

So after the Air Park we headed to the Life Support/Survival Equipment place.  There we got to try on super expensive helmets and play with night vision goggles.  Now in this one if you really squint you can imagine I’m in a plane…

This one is a helicopter pilot helmet which Tom, in his infinite wisdom, says doesn’t fit me right.  I guess it’s a pretty big relief then that I’m not actually getting to fly a helicopter anytime in the near future.

Next we did the most logical thing for lunch, a giant Chinese buffet.  Perfect.  I’m pretty sure this was a test actually.  They had us eat as much as we could and then they had us try to stay awake for an hour long briefing on Re-integration.  Re-integration is actually very interesting.  It’s the process that people who have been POW’s or hostages go through to help them deal with getting back to work and dealing with people who aren’t trying to kill you.  As interesting as the topic was, if it was a test to see if we could stay awake, I failed.  So did the majority of my class. 

Luckily the last three activities of our trip were a little more interactive.  First we got to learn what plants are the best to use for tinder and how to start a fire without matches or a lighter.  Also, we learned the cat tails are the most useful plant…ever.  Next we did a little bit of hand to hand combat training.  This was about a 20 minute lesson so there wasn’t much detail or technique that we learned but I do dare any of you to try to take me prisoner. 

The last thing we did was learn a little about parachuting.  Now this isn’t something JAGs, even AF JAGs, will probably ever do.  None-the-less, I now know the proper contact points when landing with your parachute.  I will tell you this, one of them is not your butt.  Here, let me demonstrate:

The first time I did it, I really messed it up and the instructor actually said to me, “That was ridiculous.  I can’t even look at you.”  I think this is another situation where it’s a relief I won’t be jumping out of a plane anytime soon. 

After we learned how to land, we learned what to do if we don’t land on the ground but up in a tree.  AF parachutes come standard with a little pully system that you use to slowly lower yourself down from a tree.  They really like to discourage you from landing on your butt in any situation.  They took a couple volunteers to hang from a fake tree and then lower themselves down.  For some reason this seemed like a really good idea to me so I volunteered and here I am, getting ready to get stuck in a fake tree:

And then actually stuck in the fake tree:

And then trying to get down:

Don’t worry guys.  I got down.  Eventually. 

That’s all I have for you all for a while.  Next week is our first exam and then on Friday we play ultimate frisbee for the Commandant’s Cup…that should go well…